Venue: Aberystwyth Cremarorium (that's Wales, to the uninitiated)
Present:
Lemony Snickett/Wimpey,
Pressganger,
Eric/Weirdo,
Big Stiffy/Hot Lips,
Twitcher/Other half (Wendy),
Gnome Alone (oh, that beard),
Rubber Sole/Hutch,
Tigger/Maybe,
Plod/other half (Debbie)

Scribe: Plod (edited slightly for the website by Lemony)

We were there to say good bye and celebrate the life of fellow Hasher, Golden Shower, aka Geoffrey Honeyands - a member and long time Hash Master of the Didcot Hash.

The Crematorium is situated in a beautiful location, outside the town, on the side of a wooded hill, and has been developed in a very sensitive way so as to distract one from its purpose. The grounds are magnificent and it has some beautiful views. The focal point of the 'chapel' is huge panoramic window overlooking the valley.

We started to gather from about 1.30pm. Hashers in suits and Hashettes in their best bib and tucker are a rare sight but here they all were. But then Plod arrived and promptly started unrobing in the Crem car park - right down to his shreddies. He had to be reminded that this was a not a pub car park but a place where a bit of decorum was more appropriate.

It was obviously a small, private and very much a family affair, so we we were pleased when Eileen came over and asked if we could provide a couple of pall bearers. Gnome Alone and Big Stiffy stepped forwarded and did a grand job.

Inside the 'chapel' we were welcomed by the Celebrant in what was to be an unusual but very moving experience. We started with a brief outline of the big man's life - from birth to the present time. We even learned a few things which, in different circumstances, might have come in handy in a future Hash Circle. This was followed by an emotional reading of the David Harkins funeral verse 'He Is Gone'. We were also given a few moments for private reflection - with the rock number 'Miss You Blues', sung by Mark Knopfler, playing in the background. This was followed by the committal. The whole thing was quite brief but very, very poignant.

We then departed to The Starling Cloud in Aberystwyth. Light refreshments were provided and included a generous helping of (Hash) Chips.

Some time later, Lemony Snickett called order and Twitcher stepped forward to offer a few words on behalf of the Hash. Despite having problems reading his own writing, he spoke of Geoffrey from our perspective and how the big man had guided the Hash through its transformation from a small but diminishing military hash, as the military presence in Didcot was being run down, to the popular and well supported Hash it is now. It was a brief but emotional delivery and ended with a quote from a tribute which had been posted on Facebook by Mighty Atom, a US Hasher known to most of us present.

And so the day came to an end.

We have all returned home now, Eileen. But you remain in our thoughts. Thank you for allowing us to share this occasion with you. The big man was a special person to us all - and I know I'm not just speaking for myself when I say that.

RIP, Geoffrey, On On

Post Script by Lemony Snicket:

The collection at the service was for Medecins Sans Frontieres. Didcot Hash made a donation from Hash funds of £50.

Eileen will be moving from Bodilan Fawr but does not yet know where she will be living.  Whatever your future holds, Mincing Tart, you will always be welcome at Didcot Hash – even if you turn up without Weightwatchers cake!