“The richest man is not he who has the most, but he who needs the least.”  All CS needed to make our day so special was flour and, oh yes, his mobile phone n which he had stored the map of the route.  I can’t think of a better way of spending a Sunday morning than running in the countryside with friends. Except running in the countryside with friends and eating jelly beans! 

But not everyone was having a good morning.  Henry V had two near misses while driving to the hash!  Hotlips and Big Stiffy had recently installed a dashcam in their car and, following Henry V, witnessed these.  Thank goodness there wasn’t an actual accident as Hotlips would not have been keen to offer the film in evidence as it would have included their bickering!  What a moral dilemma.

Today’s trail was being laid live and was One and On.  We set off along the road to the East before turning South and then joining the footpath to our left.  After some distance we turned back towards the road.  Pressganger took a tumble and damaged her little finger.  At the next check confusion reigned.  Runners checked back into the wood and up and down the road but couldn’t find any flour.  Eventually the woods were exhausted and the road North was being explored again when Twitcher asked if anyone had been down the footpath on the opposite side.  No-one had even spotted it.  He soon found flour and we were off again, but had allowed CS to get further ahead.  No chance of catching him now.  Zorro was seen bending over the muddy track looking at a bag of jelly beans sitting on the floor.  He insisted he had found them there and stories were invented about how they could have got there.  Was it a disgruntled parent refusing to go back after Little Johnnie through a wobbler and threw the bag down?  No, Zorro had put the packet in the Hash Sponge Bag as sustenance for the runners and they had fallen out!  We ran on through Busgrove Wood before turning South.  It was around here that Wimpey went flying and managed one of his famous rolls. We hit Neal’s Farm and continued on past Wyford Court and on to the road.  Turning North we headed back towards Stoke Row before turning off into Ipsden Wood and along Judges Road.  Running past Hutch, Hotlips suggested that his wooly hat could become a Hash award. Turning right we wiggled our way back to the main road in Stoke Row.  We took a break at the Maharajah’s Well for a photo opportunity and to give all the newer hashers a chance to see this spectacle.  Mudder, Hotlips and Lemony set off down the footpath beside the well and, through the hedgerow, spied a statue of an elephant in the park next door.  They were exploring a false and the real trail went through the park next to the well and right past the mound on which the elephant was mounted.  We met up with CS about here.  He had finished the trial but decided to you us and run the 2^nd loop again.  We joined Cox Lane and headed North past Stokerow Farm and looping round Oakingham Bottom, where Hotlips took a tumble, and heading down hill to the road.  Turning back towards the village we had to go up steeply and then slope gently down again before hitting the road and returning to the pub.   

It was warm enough to sit outside and enjoy the sun.  CS took on the roll of waiter, delivering chips and offering sauces.  Was he after a tip?

Three tumbles in one run! Lucky you, was the reply. 

The Yellow Shirt miraculously appeared from the Hash Sponge Bag but, rather than award it to Zorro again, Ringer gave it to Lesley because she would do her third run on 5 February when Ringer wouldn’t be there to name her.  Better this than be named at the joint hash with Berkshire next week as this would entail her being covered in beer and flour!  She folded it beautifully – would Laundry Maid be a good name?

CS then came to award the Hash Sponge Bag.  He suggested it is not sensible to take the mickey of the person carrying the bag when it is in their power to gift it on.  He said the new owner had to mince with the bag and tossed it at Ringer just as he was taking a gulp of beer.  I’ve never seen him foam at the mouth before! 

On On

Hares: CS

Hounds:  Outdoor Pursuit, Rubber Sole, Hutch, Zorro, Big Stiffy, Hotlips, A Cruel Joke, Mudder, Swallow, Lemony, Wimpey, Ringer, Pyro, Scrumptious, Rubber Sole’s Buddy, Twitcher, Out To Lunch, Henry V, Pressganger and Lesley, Whisper and Qualcast.

Date: 22 January 2017

Distance:  5 miles