Total confusion reigned as hounds disappeared off to the loo while Call Girl was trying to get the circle organised.  She was trying to be authoritative but everyone was chatting and ignoring her!  Then prizes were mentioned!  And a new rule!  Call Girl was a bit irritated at the lack of enthusiasm at runbacks the last time she hared a hash.  So she dictated that runbacks would be sprints as the first one back to Noddy would get a sweet. Or, as Epic described it, have a dip in Noddy’s pouch.  You might think that that set the tone for the day but no.  It got a lot lower!  There was also a new Hash marking – SSS.  What could this mean?  We would have to wait and find out.

We set off to try to find flour or sawdust or magic sawdust (this would be tricky to spot as it is invisible) and started our discovery tour of Didcot.  There were not too many highlights.  CS was very disappointed when we came to the sign saying “No Dumping”.  I fonly he had brought Poppy he could have shared the dog poo bag.  Gatecrasher, who has just made a property purchase, was eyeing up all the developments we passed, and Noddy was caught giving LRRH a piggyback ride!  We ran along side a drainage ditch, under some trees, and stopped to admire the Hash View (yes, in Didcot) over a field of sheep.   We made it into the millennium wood on the edge of Hagbourne and to the circle of stones in the middle. We each chose a stone to climb onto - except CS who was told to stand in the centre.  Babs chose the highest and pointiest, and Uranus who could hardly find anything level to stand on on his rock.  This became all the more difficult when we discovered what the SSS stood for – Simple Simon Says!!  CS stood in the centre and the game started.  “Simple Simon Says – MOON!” What a sight, CS’s white bum.  The rest of us decided not to join in.  But we all tried the standing on one leg, turning round, touching our toes, doing the Mexican wave, and copying what the person on our right did.  But all too soon we had to climb down and continue the run back to Noddy’s and the BBQ.

The drink was cracked open, the BBQ started and the salads laid out.  LRRH and Liam found Noddy’s dressing up box (I am saying nothing) and dressed most of the hashers to a greater or lesser degree.  Everyone agreed that the pink wig suited Comet but not as much as the champagne glass glasses, pig bath cap and feather boa suited Epic Fail!

After eating our fill it was time for the Hash Olympics.  Medals were on offer so everyone was taking it very seriously – Not!

First it was the sack race, then the egg and spoon race.  Was anyone in the leading group holding the egg on the spoon?  Wimpey ended up with 2 medals – guile rather than skill I am sure.  Then came the balloon game.  If you haven’t seen the film on Facebook this may not make any sense.  Uranus filmed CS and Noddy giving a demonstration – Noddy braced against a chair and CS trying to pop a balloon between them using only his magnificent powers of thrust.  This was quickly uploaded onto Facebook but Led Zepplin was unable to view it as she got a security check on her phone.  By the time we got home it seemed to have disappeared.  But the actual team relay race followed and should still be viewable.

It was time to toast marshmallows over the fire pit, have another drink, and demolish the desserts.  Then Liam tested out the hot tub while the rest of us at around chatting.  A most enjoyable day. 

Many thanks to Noddy and Call Girl and all their helpers for all their efforts.

On On 

Hares:  Call Girl and Noddy

Hounds:  Hotlips, Snickett, Wimpey, Professional Peach, Comet, Uranus, Epic Fail, Gatecrasher, Pyro and Whisper, CS, Little Red Riding Hood, Albert Square, Babs, Joseph, Liam, Led Zepplin, Nicola, Martin, Scribber, Scrumptious

Arriving for the food only:  Bong Bungie, Big Stiffy

Date:  14 August 2016

Distance: 3 Miles